The act of forgiveness is not something that we have to do, but something which we receive. The work has been done for us at the Cross; we just have to believe it as an act of faith.
The poison that we swallow in order to harm another, is fulfilled in the tortured body of Jesus Christ, who died on the Cross not just for the sins of every believer, but for the wrongs perpetrated by all people for all time, including the wrongs which we have suffered at the hands of loved ones, friends, aquaintances, and even perfect strangers.
Consider the warm gift and promise which Jesus extended to His followers shortly after his resurrection:
"Whose soever sins ye remit, they are remitted unto them; and whose soever sins ye retain, they are retained " (John 20:23 KJV)
We have by faith the power to release the pain and the hurt of having been hurt by another. The power to forgive cannot come from within ourselves, but from God the Father, through His Son Jesus Christ, by the Holy Spirit who lives and dwells within us:
"Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye." (Colossians 3:13)
We forgive not to be forgiven, but because we have been forgiven.
Consider also the parable Jesus shared about the master who frankly forgave the debt of two servants, one who owed fifty denarii, as opposed to the one who owed five hundred denarii:
"And when they had nothing to pay, he frankly forgave them both. Tell me therefore, which of them will love him most? Simon answered and said, I suppose that he, to whom he forgave most. " (Luke 7:42-43)
He who is forgiven much, loves much, and in turn forgives others. The more we receive of God's rich, inexhaustible love, the more we can easily shrug off the hurts of others, knowing full well the richness of His love more than compensates for any loss we may have suffered in time, money, or prestige.
To close, I would also ask you to take into account the blessed legacy of Joseph, a prized child who became a blessed man in a foreign land, saving not only himself, but his family, and the Egyptian nation.
After he had been promoted Prime Minister of all Egypt, second only to Pharoah, from the pit to the palace, Joseph declared through the cristening of his sons:
"And unto Joseph were born two sons before the years of famine came, which Asenath the daughter of Potipherah priest of On bare unto him. 51And Joseph called the name of the firstborn Manasseh: For God, said he, hath made me forget all my toil, and all my father's house. 52And the name of the second called he Ephraim: For God hath caused me to be fruitful in the land of my affliction. (Genesis 41:50-52)
Not only will God more than make up for the losses which we have incurred from the cruelty and neglect of others (in Joseph's case, from his jealous brothers, a lecherous wife, and a forgetful butler), He (Not "we", but "He!"} will cause us to forget the pain we endured and reward us double for all the we have lost, for "Ephraim" more accurately reads "double blessing". This double blessing so enriches us, it will be as if we never lost anything to begin with!
God is so gracious, so good, rewarding us not for our misdeeds, but out of the abundance of his grace. When believers realize and receive the rich rewards that roll out of his righteousness, forgiveness will come easily, like water after a rain!
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