Lady Gaga thinks she's a superstar because her Mommy told her so. And she's more than happy to tell us all about It.
What was Mommy's state of mind at the time? What does the Gaga-Mommy say now? Is it really best to base our best on someone else's opinion, no matter how close they are to us?
People who depend on other people to define who they are will inevitably be frustrated, if not confused and hurt in this life. Mommy says nice things to you one day, then because of bad mood yells at you the next. Are you now no longer a "superstar"? If Mommy praises you, then gets drunk behind the couch for an hour straight, do you really care that she thinks the world of you?
Parents love to tell their children they are wonderful. What motivates this fulsome praise, in part, is simple egoism. "You are my child. I brought you into the world. You are fabulous because you are a part of me." Yet parents are hardly the final say on who you are and who you can be. Consider all the people in the world who have been abandoned, despised, or even abused by their parents, yet they did not let that stop them from achieving what they wanted in this world.
The world at large will never be impressed with where you come from. The world owes you nothing, yet will stop at nothing to take from you. If anything else, whether it's our parents or our customers, people compliment us, or rather flatter us, because they want something.
This is not necessarily a cynical revelation, for how can one person's praise raise a person above himself when we cannot better ourselves by just being who we are.
What do we say to a child who fails? "You're fabulous!" What do we say to a child who has broken the rules? "You're fabulous!" Fulsome praise grows vapid very quickly.
Even kids know when they have failed, and they grow to despise people, especially their parents, who praise them for anything and everything. What is the point of doing anything if Mom and Dad and Grandma and Grandpa think highly of me no matter what? Even worse, what do we do with the flowing praise of our family who doles it out an everyone? If my sister, my brother, my uncle, aunt, second cousin twice-removed is also superstar, then what exactly am I?
No, if I am a superstar, it won't be because my parents tell me so, or anyone else, for than matter.
No comments:
Post a Comment