Sunday, December 2, 2012

A Union-Based "Twelve Days of Christmas"

A number of collective bargaining units in the Los Angeles area have engaged in grievances and work actions at the expense of their communities, their consumers, and their coworkers. In the spirit of season for going on strike and refusing to let Christmas capitalists exploit them any further, leaping lords, milking maids, and even dancing ladies have decided to walk off the job. They have it up to their golden rings with all the work they have to do during the holidays without pay.
So, in the Holiday Spirit of “collective action”, let the rest of us sing “The Twelve Days of Christmas" with respect to the influence of collective labor actions on this winter season:

“On the Twelfth Day of Christmas, the unions gave to me:

Twelve Twinkies, (since union power brought down Hostess Brand, Inc.)

Eleven Ding-Dongs (see above)

Ten stitches from protestors ( for those who fought their way into Wal-Mart)

Nine days of waiting for my presents, (because the ILWU blocked the Ports of LA and Long Beach)

Eight days of hate and imagined class warfare (see Marx, Lenin, Harry Bridges)

Seven delayed flights out of LAX (Thanks, SEIU workers, who do not even work there)

Six sleepless nights in Long Beach (hotel workers protesting)

Five Cadillac pension and benefits plans (for them, not us)

Four more years of debt and deficits (under union-backed President Obama)

Three times the car tax (almost, per Senator Ted Lieu)

Two chambers with Democratic tax-and-spend Supermajorities in Sacramento (bought and paid for by "you know who")

And a sincere desire to see union power curbed in California and the rest of the country (the Partridge also went on strike, and the pear tree retired with 90% of its salary)

Happy Holidays, everyone

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