George: So, this guy named Morpheus or Morpheo comes up to me. He's seated in this nice leather chair, and he's wearing sunglasses...
Jerry: Sunglasses?
George: Yeah, sunglasses.
Jerry: But was there actually any sun?
George: We were inside, so, yeah, it was kinda weird.
Jerry: It completely defeats the purpose! Why call them "sunglasses?" There was no sun, you were inside. If anything, he should have just worn regular glasses. What is it with people wanting to hide their eyes from the public? You can't even see with those things on!
George: You know who would have needed sunglasses? That Joshua guy in the Bible. He just stares up into the sun in the sky and says: "Stop moving!" I mean, who would not need sunglasses at a time like that? Anyway, so, Morph shows me two pills. A red pill and a blue pill.
Jerry: Whoa! Now he sounds like he's pushing some illicit substances there.
George: Sure, whatever, not that I have anything to worry about. We were alone at the time, so no one would really know. He's got the blue bill, and he tells me that if I take that pill, the story ends ...
Jerry: The story? What story? This story?!
George: The story that I am trying to tell you.
Jerry: Well, this just doesn't make any sense. What is the matter with these people?! You are not an animal!
George: OK, well, can I at least finish the story?
Jerry: Please. Continue!
George: So, Morpheo tells me that if I take the blue pill, the story ends, I wake up in bed, and I can believe anything I want to believe.
Jerry: That doesn't sound like you, George. You don't seem like the believing type.
George: Yeah, but I do wake up in bed every day, usually, and I feel that my life is over anyway, so the blue pill wasn't my thing.
Jerry: But there was another pill, right?
George: Yeah, then he had this red pill in the other hand.
Jerry: Some guy wearing sunglasses indoors--and there's no sunlight--is sitting in this leather armchair, and he's giving you pills? Didn't your parents ever teach you not to talk to strangers?
George: Hey, I felt that I had nothing to lose just listening. It's better than dealing with my parents and their bickering. I tell you, there are days I wish I could slip them a pill or two ...
Jerry: Would it be the red or the blue one?
George: Probably green, but that's beside the point.
Jerry: But the red pill ... Go on!
George: So, Morpheo tells me that if I take the red pill, he tells me that I get to stay in Wonderland and see how deep the rabbit hole goes ...
Jerry: Doesn't he know that you're afraid of dark places?
George: I don't like rabbits that much, either. I can't stand the way their noses twitch.
Jerry: Doesn't sound all that wonderful, either.
George: Well, it's not that bad. But how does he expect to take me down this rabbit hole while wearing those sunglasses? I was still trying to figure that one out.
Jerry: And the Wonderland thing, too. Why couldn't he have stuck to the source material? After all, when Alice finds one bottle, it says, "Drink me to get big." He could have at least saved you the trouble and just given you the directions, to say the least!
George: I know! Some people. No courtesy whatsoever!
Jerry: Well, which pill did you take?
George: Are you kidding me? He gives me a pill to swallow, and no water?! Oh ho, no! I'm not doing that!
Jerry: Good for you, George! He should have given you a candy bar or some sugar to make the medicine go down, right?
George: And who says it was medicine, anyway? The blue one would take me back to where I already was, and I'm sick of that. The red one sounds like it would have taken me on some psychedelic trip, and the thought of that just made me sick.
Jerry: I'm getting sick just hearing you talk about it.
George: So, what do you want to do? Get something to eat?
Jerry: Should we go to the joint with the red seats or the blue seats?
George: Does everything have to be a binary choice like this? It's so agonizing. So much to deal with. Jerry, I'm going home. I'm going to bed!
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